(Warning! Do not try this at home!)
And apologies in advance for another internet joke.

There's this guy with a parrot. This parrot swears like a sailor... I
mean he's a pistol. He could swear for five minutes straight without
repeating himself. Trouble is, the fella that owned him was a quiet,
conservative type, and this bird's foul mouth drove him crazy.

One day, while the guy was reading the paper it got to be too much, so
the
guy grabbed the bird by the throat, shook him really hard, and yelled,
"QUIT IT!"

This just made the bird mad, and he swore more than ever.

The guy got mad and said, "OK, that's it for you" and locked the bird in
a kitchen cabinet. This really aggravated the bird so he clawed and
scratched at the door. When the guy finally let him out, the bird cut
loose with a stream of invective that would make a veteran sailor blush.

At that point, the guy was so mad that he threw the bird into the
freezer.
For the first few seconds there was a terrible din. The bird kicked and
clawed and thrashed about. Then it suddenly got very... very... quiet.

At first the guy just waited, but then he started to think that the bird
may be hurt. After a couple of moments of silence, he was so worried
that
he opened up the freezer door.

At that point, the bird calmly climbed from the freezer onto the man's
out-stretched arm and said, "Awfully sorry about the trouble I gave you.
I'll
do my best to improve my vocabulary from now on."

The man was astounded. A transformation that had come over the parrot,
rendering him quiet and well-behaved.

The man left the parrot to his cage and went back to reading his paper.
After a few reflective minutes, the parrot cocked his head, looked at the
man, and said "By the way, what did the chicken do wrong ?"

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Only when the last tree has been cut down,
Only when the last river has been poisoned,
Only when the last fish has been caught,
Only then will you find that money cannot be eaten.
==========================================
Cliff Drake
Ballard, WA
Birder at Juno.com