A different slant on the "F", "S" and other words that cause offense to
people. As a user of these words from time to time, I could not understand
why my wife, now of 31 years, took such offense to them when we were first
married. We would have discussion about my usage and I would explain that
they are just words that convey emotions and she would say "But.."

It was not until we solved another area of confusion about each others thought
patterns that the real reason for Irma's uncomfortableness came to light. It
turns out that my thought pattern is verbal most of the time, whereas Irma's
is pictorial. So in my mind a word is a word that denotes and connotes
meaning. For me the naughty words under discussion connoted emotion: anger,
frustration, excitement, etc.; not the literal denotation of the word.

However, for Irma, who thinks primarily in pictures, it is the denotation of
the word she sees: In her mind she sees the literal meaning of the word,
which is the turnoff for her. If I reacted the same way to the words,
visualizing the actual meaning of the words, not the connotations associated
with the words, I probably would have the same reaction that many people have
to them, who have a thought pattern similar to Irma's.

I know that in some places the words are very appropriate and CONNOTE more
affectively than any other word in the English language the real feelings one
is experiencing. But I know that in other places they are totally
inappropriate and just not used and one has to put forth effort to convey
their meaning fully using more socially accepted words. Just as we dress
appropriately for different occasions, we have to adjust our language for
different occasions and places.

What we forget on the net is we do not know who is going to be the end reader
of our message. Remember, for every one of us who post to a BB, there are
20-50 lurkers who are reading what we post. So remember what you would not
say in front of a group of people that you do not know you should not say on
the net, because most of your readers are unknown to you even if they share
your interest in birding.

Great birding and find that next lifer,

John (One of Birders2)
John + Irma = 2, we are birders, too.

John C. LeVine
Birders2 at aol.com
Los Angeles, CA

The problem with Modern Man is he can no
longer see the stars at night through his city lights.
_____________________________________________________
A thought on a moonless night in Big Bend National Park 4/30/97