Alan Grenon's recent post about flocks of Robins feeding on Madrona berries in Discovery Park reminded me of that somewhat classic wildlife holiday event: getting drunk.

I'm not talking about inebriated hominids in places like the Anchor Pub, or at holiday parties. I'm referring to our fuzzy and feathery friends getting blotto on naturally fermenting fruit, ect. I presume it's unintentional. At any rate, lots of critters really can't handle their booze.

The Robin/ Madrone connection reminded me of my first observation of drunken creatures way back in 1975. I was hitchhiking up the California coast just after Christmas, and spent the night in a State Park near Santa Cruz, camped in a Madrone grove. The Nature Gods, Santa Cruz, or Santa Claus - whoever- delivered just the right conditions to provide fermented Madrone berries. I awoke to a cacophony of drunk Robins. They didn't sound like normal Robins - they were smashed, and crashing around up in the trees, falling off branches, ect.

A few years later, over a period of several years, I encountered the Great Pyracantha Death Trap on I-5 near Boeing Field in the late fall as the Pyracantha berries were fermenting. Getting faced on the berries, Robins then walked out into traffic - the road was littered with flat Robins and their feathers. Note to wildlife plant advocates: don't plant fermentable fruiting plants along busy roads.

In college I had a perfessor who'd taught somewhere down in the South - Persimmon country. He had a great story of squirrels, and various birds getting totally drunky-poo on fermented persimmons. Both the mammals and birds were jumping or flying to branches that weren't there: flying single, seeing double. Critters falling out of tree's ect. I guess it was quite the scene.

As with humans, this is risky behavior for all animals. Dangerous. Flying into tree trunks, walls, windows, ect. And what about the vulnerability to predators? Like a drunk getting rolled for his wallet, how about those animal predators? I imagine if Raptors had a Facebook page up about now: " Hey everybody, there's gonna be a big Thrush kegger down at the Madrona grove this morning. Like we all say 'Fly Hammered, Get Nailed!'." I do wonder how much predators benefit from these vulnerable drunk critters.

So be careful out there. Don't drive, or fly, or play in traffic when drunk. And be careful around fermenting fruit in your neighborhood. In certain cases wearing a hard hat and protective eyewear might be appropriate. Getting hit in the head by a Flicker drunk on apple wine could really hurt. Drunk flying Wild Turkey's - I don't want to go there.

Jeff Gibson
The Anchor Pub
Everett Wa