Being an omnivore I'm not allergic to the notion of hunting, when done responsibly. I don't like guns though - make too damn much noise and generally are prone to enable trouble.

However as a kid I read, probably 10 times, "The Old Man and the Boy" by Robert Ruark. Set in North Carolina, it's basically a series of stories about a boy and his grandfather and all of their hunting and fishing adventures, including some good basic land ethic notions, sensitivity to the locale, and last but not least, wonderful descriptions of southern cooking that still are with me all these years. As a Seattle boy raised with English cooking, all that southern game cookery sounded incredibly exotic. Gumbo, hushpuppies, grits and all, were mysterious and intriguing names. Since then I've always enjoyed reading about food.

So along comes the 'Collard Dove' thread on tweeters, which I think is funny and dovetails neatly into my notions of dealing with invasive species: if you cant beat em', eat em', plant or animal - if possible. Collared Doves are heftier than Mourning Doves so maybe slightly more than a mouthful. Collards being a classic southern vegetable got me to thinking about a field recipe for the critter for a hunter and dogs:

"Collard Dove with Grits and Hushpuppies"
1. clean the bird, removing the entrails : dove's ingest grit to aid in digesting their food and you don't want to ruin your teeth ,so set innards aside.
2. coat the bird with olive oil and your favorite spices and roast on a stick over the fire till done.
3. Toss the innards, grits and all, to the dogs to hush those puppies while you're eating the good stuff.

Actually, I don't have a bone to pick with Collard Doves to date - I've only seen one and thought it was kind of cute. However the word on the street sounds ominous. I overheard the following conversation down at the Anchor Pub just the other night:

" You know Bert, seems like everywhere I go I keep hearing about them damn Collard Doves!'
" Sounds yummy. What is it?"
" Well it's some damn foreign bird, from yerp or someplace that's set to take over our fine country. I read about it."
" Hell Ernie, I didn't know you read!"
" OK, so I heard about it at the checkout line at 7-eleven. Some gal was sayin' that these damn Collard Doves are the reincarnation of all
those damn Passenger Pigeons we got rid of years ago. She says their all comin' back and are gonna stage some sort of coup."
" Did you say coo ? "
" Yeah, coup. Their gonna eat up all our food supplies and stuff. The next time you reach for a corndog, it might not have any corn on it".
" Damn birds anyway! It's just like them birds the Russians sent over here to eat all our fish, whatchamacallems, them Caspian Turns".
"Caspian, that sounds Russian alright, like rushin' over here and stealing our stuff!"
" Damn foreigners!"

Jeff Gibson
The Anchor Pub
1001 Hewitt Ave.
Everett WA